Thursday Hate: Long emails that say absolutely nothing

I blogged before about corporate gibberish and I must say, this problem just keeps coming up. Perhaps people feel guilty about writing short emails, as if it’s being rude or it shows you haven’t spent much time thinking about the topic at hand. When in fact, it’s just the opposite. Clear, concise emails are things of beauty. They show the recipient that you have indeed considered all the angles and that you respect the value of their time as much as your own.

Golden rules for email:

• State your position clearly (even if it is “I haven’t decided yet”)
• Summarize the discussion to date (but only in one sentence)
• Write meaningful subject lines
• Never change subject lines (it upsets inbox sorting)
• Cut out extraneous platitudes

About the last rule, if you are writing someone for the first time in a while, obviously it’s acceptable to throw in a “Hope you’ve been well” or “How’s business?” or whatever. But the more often you write someone — and with internal emails especially — the less important it is to thank them profusely for their utmost kindness and greatest regards. It’s okay, really. You won’t offend me — I still love you!